Calliander, I have no other way of reaching you and need to talk.  Call me or IM at your earliest convenience. It's fairly important.

Well, Calliander, funny you mentioned that little blurb about wanting to see us east cost folk, because I'm gonna be in your neck of the woods on July 7th to the 14th.  Do drop me a line if you wanna hang.

Congratulations, Timmy my boy.  It was a long haul, but you've graduated, and I'm quite proud for you.  Drop me a line some time, we'll go get shitty drunk!

Interesting that you mentioned the fact that we've all fractured into different groups as opposed to a larger whole.  I was just thinking about this the other day.  However I don't honestly believe that our group of friends is in it's current state of affairs due to the fact that "we were dicks to eachother".  Rather, I believe that's a symptom of a larger situation.  The plain and simple fact is that we are becoming grown ups.  We all have our different situations right now.  We are all in very different places mentally and emotionally right now. 

Even in high school we were an ecclectic mix.  Stoners, Geeks, Brains, Jocks and Outcasts... we were a large group of disparate types.  For some reason it worked.  But as we have grown up, we have also grown more different.  Pappy and Wilson are running a business of their own creation.  Calliander, you are starting up a life with a girl you love and running a happy household.  Stone is well on his way to being a successful business man.  Caniprokis is putting himself through school.  Bean and Blood are settling down from their crazed younger years and trying to put their lives together.  I'm trying to figure out who the fuck I am and what the fuck it is that I want to do with my life.  But look at those descriptions.   All of them are very different.

In closing I believe that we are not growing apart from each other because we're being dicks to each other, but we are being dicks to each other because we are growing apart.

Well, I've been driving for nearly a month now.  Roving about, having solo adventures, existing outside of a group entity.  And I've come to one solitary decision I've come to.  The world outside of my basement is warped, bizarre and twisted.  So, without further ado, I'd like to share with you my list of the top five weirdest things I've seen since I've gained my new found independence.

5.  Going to Stop and Shop at the wee hours of the morning - Man, this place is creepy long about 2-3 am.  It's like something out of a bad Romero movie.  It's all dark and shady.  Boxes strewn about the place.  As a nocturnal creature that shouldn't bother me, but seeing a place that is that large and bussling during the day become a dark ghost town at night is just uncomforting.

4.  People watching at Wal-mart -  Since getting wheels, I've become wal-mart trash... The place has everything: DVD's, cheap junk food, action figures... Basically everything I need to live.  I may be wal-mart trash, but in my increased time there, I've seen some REAL scummy people.  I mean, damn, these people must be missing some freakin' chromosomes or something.

3.  Being encouraged to join a Manage a Trois where the boob to penis ratio was not in my favor - One night after cruising for skanks at a local bar, a friend and I went home with some girls.  Later in the evening my friend said and I quote: "I think the fat one is taken, but I'm pretty sure we could tag team the hot one."  To which I calmly answered "Nah man, I'm straight."

2.  Seeing a man light his face on fire - Once again, As all good, strange events start - I was at a bar last friday with some friends.  There was this crazy looking bastard in the corner playing video golf.  He just had a crazed look in his eye.  His head was shaved shiny bald exposing a MASSIVE scar on his head, and a thick beard.  Picture Woolly Willy hopped up on nyquil and amphetimenes.  Well, anyway, the guy walks up to the bar, takes a shot of some flaming liquid, and then whips his shirt off and starts putting his face out.  Apparently the flames lit this crazy bastard's beard on fire, as well as burning his innards because this Rhodes Scholar didn't put his shot out before drinking it.  The cops showed up and he had to be taken off in an ambulance.

1.  Getting hickeyed by a 50 year old woman against my will - Yeah, nothing quite tops the weird/awkward factor on this one.  ONCE AGAIN I was at a bar and a friend and Kim started talking to this beligerantly drunk (and hideous) quintagenarian.  "Blah blah blah, I've never given a BJ, Blah Blah Blah I just divorced my husband of 28 years, Blah blah blah Men only want one thing blah blah blah."  During this whole drunken diatribe, I remain silent and don't say a word despite the fact that this woman my crossed legs a boob rest.  Anyway, She starts crying about being too old to be single and says "I'd like a hug from this big guy here".  Well, I'm not made of stone so I give her the "there-there" hug.  She responds in turn by SUCKING ON MY NECK!  Men are only interested in one thing in deed.

Now that I look at all this, I think I should just not go to bars.  3 out of 5 weird moments are brought to you by bar frequenting.  Time to find some nice people.  Fuck it, I'm going to church.

As many of you know, I have always been ardently anti political in the past.  In my opinion individual votes didn't matter, so whether or not I voted had no effect.  And even if it did, It was just to see who maintains the status quo for four years.  Well, what a four years this has been.  Look at America four years ago, and look at it now.  We've been the target of terrorist attacks, our economy is in the toilet, and we just hemmoraged money to finance a war in which no WMD's were found.  Hell, I would have settled for them just saying "Ok, we're just gonna go in there, blow shit up, and take their oil."  BUT THEY JUST BLEW SHIT UP AND DIDN'T EVEN SEIZE ANY OIL PROFITS!!!

My theory that individual votes don't count was shot down last election.  And if the America we have now is going to be the status quo, I'm thinking of applying for Canadian citizenship, I mean at least that way I won't have to shell out a weeks pay every month in health insurance just so I can lead a normal life.  So, I will be voting.  Maybe.  If topics are right.  Namely jobs.  My question to the more politically inclined of our posters is which candidate is camapaigning on the employment bandwagon?  Please say it ain't Bush, because if it is... I don't believe him.  Look what he's done so far. 

This is really an important issue for me as I am tired of being a 24 year old deli man with an $80,000 degree.  Hell, at least if I were just a 24 year old deli man, I wouldn't be 20 grand in debt.  Every week I look in the papers and go "Fuck, well maybe next week..."  That has been my Sunday for the past 2 years.  Between companies out sourcing their white collar and tech jobs to fucking india, and their blue collar jobs to mexico, where the fuck are Americans supposed to work?

On a lighter note, Pappy passed on a rather hysterical bit of text to me last night...  Now, I knew, even back in high school that the class of '98 were a bunch of loser assholes, pappy gave me more proof last night.  He showed me the invitation to our 5 year reunion, to be held July 31st 2004.  Now, I was not a math major, in fact I damn near failed Business Calculas, but I do know that it's been SIX years since we graduated.  SIX!  A-holes.  And where is this classy shindig taking place?  Some elks club...  Hot dogs and burgers will be supplied, but it's BYOB.  Now do the ass clowns putting this dog and pony show honestly expect you guys to fly 3000 miles for Beanie Wienies and BYOB?  And me?  Well, I haven't made enough of my life yet to laugh at everyone in attendance, so, I'll have to wait for the 10 year.  See ya there... maybe they might have Pasta Salad and Budweiser by then!

Well, it certainly took long enough (8 years to be precise) but I am now amongst the driving ranks.  That's right, you heard that correctly!  Since none of you guys are around to cart my sorry ass all over hell's half acre, I finally had to go out and get my own wheels... DICKS!  I've been relearning how to drive for the past few months, and Friday, I get my own car.  Now what type of wheels would a smooth pimp daddy like myself be tooling around in, you ask?  A slick ass '94 Cavalier station wagon... I have dubbed it...  THE SEX WAGON.  Be warned disbelievers!

Now, you may be right about my vague storytelling and lack of true details as being somewhat indirect even cowardly... but the reason for that is a very good one.  My reason for starting this off was two fold.  One, I wanted to clear the air with Caniprokis... and two to express my distaste for how I have been treated by many of you.  Now was this past post sophomoric and "Drama causing", sure... but hey what can I say, I wrote it angry.  But all the words that needed to be spoken between Caniprokis have been spoken, and that's that.  And I achieved my second goal as well.

But you will not get a full, clear explanation of events from me for one simple fact:  It is the business of no one who still posts on this site.  This is between me, wilsor's ex, and now that all dirty laundry has been aired, Wilsor.  I didn't write my full side of the story because it shouldn't matter to you guys.  As friends you guys should know the following facts:

1. I did something of questionable (not even flat out wrong, questionable) moral character.
2. I never lied, or denied anything that went on (but I didn't exactly run crying to tattle on myself either)
3. I never asked any of you to lie for me.

And that's all you guys should know or care about.  I wanted to find a way to tell Wilson myself, but I felt it was news that should be done face to face, and not by going online and saying "HEY, GUESS WHAT!!!".  But before I could find that proper time, our little quilting circle cracked the story, and the shit hit the fan.  Nobody even bothered to check with me if these rumors were true, honestly I would have enjoyed your council on the matter, but didn't tell anyone myself, for fear of exactly what happened, hapenning.  This honestly should have come from me, or wilsor's ex... if for no other reason than that he deserved better than to hear from the sources he did. 

I had a heart to heart with Caniprokis the day after my and many things were said... but among the things he said, the one that stuck with me the most is that I have to assess matters and grow up.  And that's true... I've got a lot of growing up to do... but before any of you start thinking about how much more mature you are than I am, just think about how you personally handled the information about my transgression when you recieved it.  If you didn't start gabbing like a ninny, then you have all the right in the world to think what you do.

P.S.  Thanks to Stone for keeping his word for me.  You didn't run and tell, but when you were confronted, you didn't lie for me.  Thank you.

Heh... time for me to do something I haven't done in a few months.  Time to stir up a shit storm.   Now in years past I've always extolled the virtues of loyalty and friendship.  I've preached brotherhood while not always paying heed to it.  But the idea of loyalty to ones friends has always been one I've admired and hoped to live up to.  But what happens when you don't live up to the standards you hold for others.  Well, that was the situation I found myself in at the beginning of this summer.  I'd betrayed a friend, and was caught. 

For a long time I'd beaten myself up over what had happened.  I'd lost half my friends over it, but it was not unwarranted.  I never claimed what I did deserved forgiveness, and I never asked anyone for it.  Was I ever asked for my side of the story?  No, but I'm sure the third and fourth hand intermediaries relayed all the information faithfully.  Do I wish I had handled matters more honorably, yes.  Do I wish I'd hurt less people, yes.  But that's the past.  I can't do anything about that now.  Besides Karma eventually caught up to me. 

But then, I reached an epiphany...  The notion of loyalty to one's friends is a ridiculous idea.  Let's face it, we all have some price we can be bought for.  Money, drugs, sex... whatever it is, we can be bought and sold with it.  Humans are hard wired for this shit.  Yeah, it's all good when times are fun, and you're hanging out.  It's easy to say you're going to be brothers forever when things are all in order.  But ultimately it's all bullshit.  Brothers eventually outgrow you, or move away and forget about you, or even worse, come back and fuck the woman that almost every psychological problem you have about the opposite sex revolves around.  It's just the way things are.

Then imagine the hearty chuckle I got when I got wind (I had the honor of hearing this through a second hand intermediary, I felt blessed.) that a mutual friend of both me and the person I betrayed came back and promptly chose to ignore me out of "loyalty".  Now, If we were all as loyal as we claim, this person would have shown true loyalty to the both of us and stayed out of the entire matter as it is none of his business.  Or at least have asked me what the fuck I was thinking and gotten my side of the story.  But people are not loyal, and that would be asking too much.  I would like this person to know that I'm not mad, and I don't expect that he should show me any loyalty.

In summation people as a whole are a nasty lot of vipers.  Everybody has a price, loyalty is and illusion.  I don't expect our common history together as friends to be anything more than that.  History.  I'd like to close this statement out by saying to all those who still count themselves as my friend, thank you.  But just to be crystal clear on this: for the right price I will sell your ass out without a second thought.

What up fuckers!  It's been pretty silent on this bitch for a while so I'd figured I'd open my giant fucking yap.  So, I'm talking to my fellow coworker the other night and he goes to me "Oh, dude!  Did you see Fear Factor last night?  They were eating stink beetles and cow eyeballs!"  At that point I had a saddening and depressing epiphany.  When did the general public become so brain dead that this horse crap is considered entertainment?!?

I personally blame this reality TV rage on "Who wants to be a Millionaire".  Now I know what you're saying:  "Lio, this wasn't reality TV".  No, but it proved to the networks that they could have a number 1 tv show with just the promise of shelling out a million bucks every so often (it may sound like a lot, but keep in mind that's what each of those Friends assholes gets for one episode, even that douche bag David Schwimmer).  No paying those costly writers, directors and people with actual talent.  Of course "Millionaire" spawned a number of bastard children.  My personal favorite was "Which One of You is the Biggest Gold Digging Whore"... I mean... "Who wants to marry a Millionaire."  However, the most culturally significant show that Millionaire spawned was Survivor.  This shitbag of a "show" proved that you could drop some camera equipment and a bunch of the most annoying people in the world on a desert island and still turn a profit.  After that... fuck... The flood gates for reality TV broke.  God, remember when TV had writers, and plots... and... and, meh... screw it.

While we're on the TV and the fucking albatross it has become, I was watching the boob toob tonight at 1 am, as I usually do because I'm pathetic, and I happened upon Sex 2k on MTV.  Now for those not in the know, this show showcases deviant lifestyles and displays them on MTV so that our children can be exposed to them and be tolerant of perverts that should be cured of their sickness by FIRE!!!  Any hoo... the topic of tonights episode was "Furries".  It turns out there are wacked out fuck jobs out there that get their jollies off by dressing up like giant stuffed animals and fucking eachother in the ass.  And, supposedly there is this huge internet community out their that gets off on erotic anthropomorhic cartoons and strives to be like them.  I'm sorry, but if you like to spend your time whacking off to Looney Toons with Genitalia, you should be dragged out into the town square, put into a pillary and have hot coals shoved up your ass.  And then get castrated.  I can't believe they are showing this shit on MTV (The average viewer is what 12?  13?) as a choice of sexual lifestyle.  I'm sorry people, but sometimes tolerance goes to far.  Sometimes you have to say, "You fucking deviant shitbag". 

On that note I'd like to announce that I am running for pope and will be starting a new inquistion that will hunt down Furries and TV execs that cram This horse crap down our throats.  It's time to burn some heathens and heritics.  Hail to the king.