6'3", 190lbs, short dark hair, Italian looking. People assume I'm gay sometimes because I haven't gone a day without showering at least once since the 40's, have farted twice in my 21 year existance, have silky smooth hands, and I sweat Old Spice, but I'm strizzzaight. Although if I went to prison I'd probably go gay after about a week, I need affection. Unless I was only in the joint for 6 months or something, then I'd wait but if I was in there for like 10 years I'd go get some nookie in the shower. Plus it's better to have a bitch in prison than be the bitch in prison, and I think the way it works is it's no fun to rape a guy in prison if he likes it. I'd act all butch and gay so no one would try to make me the prison slut, I think it'd work out. Speaking of sluts, why are there so many busted looking women making pornos? I'm so tired of these women that look like they were in the middle of the makeup store when a tornado hit, bodies so skinny their bones are poking out, huge fake boobs, and ugly faces. If I'm watching a porno I want to see cute real looking girls with real boobs, not some old skank that looks like she was created in a lab as inexpensively as possible. When I'm running the adult film industry there will be changes, mark my words.
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Category: GamingI loved going to Arjun's house, I remember that time Pappy ran that awesome Warhammer adventure at Arjun's for me, Stone, Devon, Brad and Ryan and we had to fight that creature named Ahto the assho or something in that maze, that was some dope shit. I hated when Devon put my elastics on his feet so fucking much, he'd always take them off my magic cards when I wasn't looking and I'd be doing something and all of a sudden out of the corner of my eye I'd see Devon giggling with his bare feet up in the air and my elastic bands all around his toes. So I'd get all pissed and Pappy would laugh his ass off while I chased Devon around Stone's house and Stone would throw dice at us each time we ran by the table. I remember all that old school stuff, remember that game Thunder Road? That game ruled. And how we'd make our own rules for developing nukes in Supremacy, and we'd play Milles Bourne and Uno in the mornings at the Intermediate School while Calliander and I gave sermons about how Genesis was better than SNES. And then at lunch TA would always do funny stuff to make Devon spit out his juice and food and all the other tables would give us shitty looks, and sometimes one of those asshole BIS administrators would come give us shit. Or when we'd go swimming at Stone's and Ryan would pull down his shorts and do the humpback whale thing to freak Devon out. I remember the night Devon and I went to see Dumb and Dumber and he had to pee throughout the whole movie but he was laughing too hard to get up because he thought he'd piss himself, so at the end he ran screaming into the restroom and I pretended I wasn't with him because everyone was giving him the stinkeye. Or the time I saw Street Fighter the Movie with Arjun and Stone and it was so terrible that we were throwing food and shit for entertainment. I remember how Arjun's Mom used to always take us to the mall and make food for everyone, she was so great. Or when we'd sleep over at Brad's house and watch scrambled porn on Spice all night. I could go on forever with all that old school shit, but I won't. We used to be so innocent.....