I've had the longest week ever and I'm so glad it's nearing its end. I had an exam Tuesday night and one this morning. I had to proctor an exam Wednesday night. I had 3 hours of tutoring, 8 hours in the help center, 5 hours in classes I don't take, and then my normal 4 classes. It's just been a really long week, ya know?
So here I am sitting in a computer lab in Lederle, the building where I have all my classes. I'm about a mile from my dorm room and my lovely bed where I want to be. It's 9:47 in the morning; I just finished taking an abstract algebra exam. Surprisingly, I think that I did pretty well. There were 6 questions and only the best 5 are graded. I'd so like a good GPA this semester to bring up my cumulative.
So I thought this would end the longest week ever, but no such luck. Next week I have another exam, one in geometry. I have homework that is due for 3 out of 4 of my classes that I know of, and I'm sure I'll have something due for my writing class as well. I have to write my proposal that I didn't do, but the old fuck wasn't there when I went for my meeting anyhow. Okay, so I have to write a paper on "a familiar scientific but nonmathematical topic." This is for my math writing class. I don't know what to write about. Get this, I'm a math major. I haven't taken any scientific nonmathematical classes since high school and anything that I learned then isn't familiar anymore. Plus it only has to be a short paper, and I don't want anything too hard. Here are my thoughts: anthrax, some disease, how something works. I don't know, what do you think?
This semester, I have worked the hardest that I think I ever have in my life. I have kept up with all my classes, done all my homework, and worked over 20 hours a week. This semester, I feel the stupidest that I have ever felt. Did you ever notice that the more you learn, the more you realize that there is so much more to learn? The more you know, the more that you don't know. Something like that. Maybe it isn't the same for English majors. Maybe it is. Whatever, it's frustrating.
Is this too whiny for you FlyingTim? I don't know why you chose to single me out for bitching. Whatever, it's old now.
I want to go somewhere. I need a break where I can get away from all my homework and work and everything and just relax. Maybe I just need to get good and drunk. I just want one night's sleep where I don't dream about fucking abstract algebra or geometry or something. It's no good to dream about math -- what kind of a rest is it if I can't get away from what I'm doing all day long? It's no good.
Wilson says this is stress. I don't feel that stressed. I mean, sure, I have things to do all the time, but nothing that is unmanageable. Dreaming about math, well, maybe that's just that I can't get my brain to relax. My stomach hurts. Not like indigestion or cramps or anything, but like a pain under the surface. It's not like a bruise or a cut that is on the surface, but something in the lining or something. I'm thinking ulcer. Then I'm thinking that I'm overreacting of course. I hardly think my life is stressful enough to warrant an ulcer. I don't have time to deal with that shit anyway.
Add this to my list of things that I don't understand: how the shower walls get covered in hair. How does this accidentally happen? I think people have to actually put hair on the walls for a reason. Maybe it's stuck to you hand and getting it to stick to the wall is the only way of getting it off your hand. Okay, sure. But why do you leave it there? Is it because it doesn't bother you so what do you care if it bothers anyone else? Well it's a little disgusting don't you think?
Here's another thing that I don't understand. Why does my roommate have so much time to go out and I have so much more homework? Is it because her classes are a joke? I don't remember having it that easy freshman year. What did I do wrong? Was it that I picked a serious major instead of just going through half my college career as undecided? I want to be an English major. I want to play Frisbee.
Well I guess that's all I have to say right now. I doubt anyone but maybe Ashley, Wilson, and maybe Pappy is still reading. So thanks to you, and fuck off to everyone else.
Ya know, I hate people, most people. Have a nice day.
1212 Out.