We hate to announce this, since we know many people with them (including some of us), but these “epic” beards are no longer acceptable. (Let’s not forget that “epic” is unacceptable on its own.)
One of the two main reasons is that the majority of these guys don’t take care of their great-big-bushy-beards or, if they do, they do so horribly. However, the more important reason is this puerile, “real men have beards!” assertion.
Guess what: Real men do whatever the fuck they want with their facial hair and don’t brag about it.
Epic Beards: Unacceptable.
You brought it on yourselves, douchebags!