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  • Author:FlyingTim
  • Email Address:flyingtim at insult dot org
  • Contribution:81 rants by this author
  • Percent of Insult: 3.46%
  • Age:21
  • Sex:Male
  • Sexual Preference:Heterosexual
  • Marital Status:Single
  • Penis Length:I'm a horse!
  • Location:Connecticut
  • Drug of Choice:Nitrous
  • Physical Self Description:

    6'2", light brown hair, blue eyes...

  • Bio:

    FFeh.

Thank You

posted by FlyingTim () on
Category: MiscCategory: Misc
I'd just like to thank everyone who came last night for my birthday. It's really nice to be surrounded by all of your friends and just have a good time. Id also like to apologize for my absence at Lio's house later in the evening, there was a small emergency created that I had to deal with and ended up not being able to have been there. Anyhow, thanks again, guys, for being there and for your cards and gifts. You really did make it a Happy Birthday.

Wild Horses

posted by FlyingTim () on
Category: MiscCategory: Misc
It's the Mustang lifestyle, man. Wild, footloose and fancy-free, and apparently broke as hell. I wonder if Ford should adopt that as their Mustang campaign...

Ahem...

posted by FlyingTim () on
Category: MiscCategory: Misc
Lio, I can no longer keep up this paltry sham of an existence that I have been living. It is time to come clean. So, I think it only fair of me to tell you that once, in 1972, when you were passed out backstage at a Jethro Tull concert, I allowed Ian Anderson to sodomize you with his flute for an autographed copy of Aqualung. Sorry man, you can have the album, if it will make you feel any better.

Ozias

posted by FlyingTim () on
Category: MiscCategory: Misc
You think you know someone after sharing that extra-special ghost hunting bond. Ffeh.

Thank you, suck my dick, Goodnight!

Ffeh

posted by FlyingTim () on
Category: MiscCategory: Misc
Thought this might be of interest...

SuperHappyFunSite!

The internet is a weird, wild place.

Nipsy

posted by FlyingTim () on
Category: MiscCategory: Misc
Happy Birthday Caniprokis!!! Love ya bro.

I heart finals

posted by FlyingTim () on
Category: MiscCategory: Misc
I know what you're all thinking. Holy shit! Tim is alive! Well, I have one thing to say to that. Ffeh.

I hate finals. In particular, I hate not going to class, then feeling bad about not going, then not feeling bad enough to make me want to go, and then doing all my assignments for said class in the last 2 weeks. Also, I hate computer science *professors* who teach us about dot-matrix printers and LCD displays on your brandy-new TI-82. And I reallllly fucking hate the same teacher telling me, an English major, that I don't structure my business letters correctly and that my mail merge didn't work.

On the upside, I do love seeing people I graduated with. I saw Katy Bradley in the supermarket the other day, and mah-oh-mah she got fat. Speaking of which, I'd be willing to bet that Super Paul won't organize a damn thing outside of an ultimate frisbee game on his front lawn and we're all going to get letters from Big Jen about our 5th, and there's going to be a list of unfound people, including, but not limited to, Graig Judge, Kevin Brushett, Sarah Rothermel, Jeff Manfredonia and Jamie Arcand, for you old timers like me.

At any rate, I have to get back to my british poetry paper, which I have titled "Do It Yourself Eunuch." Not really, but I'll bet that would be a damn good paper.

Rum

posted by FlyingTim () on
Category: DrunkCategory: Drunk
I'm just wondering if it's okay to get drunk with your dad on a Thursday night. Discuss.

Violence

posted by FlyingTim () on
Category: SexCategory: Sex
I think that all men who abuse women should be locked up in a prison like the one in the Shawshank Redemption. Fuck that Hilton otherwise knows as Oz...they need to go to places with tiny cells made of stone with actual bars on the windows and doors, a place where the inmates rape you and the guards beat you up. A place where you can't go outside 10 months of the year because there's too much snow on the ground. A place where you can't trust the food, a place where you can't trust your cell mate, a place where you can't trust your own mind to stay sane. I want a place well out of health code, a place infested with rats and cockroaches, a place where you may just end up dead before breakfast. I want them to spend of their lives suffering, but if they have to be put to death because of what they have done, then a lifetime of suffering has to packed into one act. And fuck the idea of cruel and unusual punishment. That is a right for real Americans, as soon as you violated someone's right to happiness by beating the shit out of them, then you throw your own rights out the window. Bring brack drawn and quartering, having ants slowly eat his head, old school torture techniques. Thats what I want for men who abuse women. Thank you.

More Birthday Greetings

posted by FlyingTim () on
Category: PeopleCategory: People
Yo Yo Arcee...Happy 20th Birthday, I'm giving you permission to go get completely trashed this weekend. You're welcome.